My best friend & I are turning 30 tomorrow.
Nicole: I’m a twenty-something! If you need me, I’ll just be over here livin’ up my twenty-somethingdom. Because I’m in my twenties! wheeeeeeeeee
Rei: You & I are so in our twenties. I’m gonna go rent an apartment for a month and a half and forget to do my taxes. Then I’m gonna climb a building and go dumpster diving and sleep with a nineteen-year-old.
Nicole: I’m gonna drink too much coffee and stay up all night and tweet a bunch.
Rei: I’m gonna write ambiguous status updates that could be about either contemplating suicide or Breaking Bad.
Nicole: I'm gonna pack all my stuff in my escort and drop it off in my dad's basement while I go backpack through Europe and go to ALL THE DISCOTECAS.
Rei: I’m gonna work at an artisan bakery and not worry about my teeth or credit score.
Nicole: I'm gonna wear a candy necklace ironically because, you know, i'm not a teenager.
Rei: I'm gonna be concerned about what teenagers think of me. And then I’m gonna hold a lot of concrete opinions and philosophies about pretty much everything and be a complete stranger to uncertainty.
Nicole: I’m gonna precisely lay out what my life will look like by the time I’m 30 and journal about it. And then I’m gonna get lost in a sketchy area at dark and ask everyone I see for directions.
Rei: I’m going to be extremely concerned about my oral sex technique and then I’m going to do my laundry in the bathtub. I’m going to sleep with a 34-year-old who “doesn’t want to talk.” Then I’m going to get frustrated over other people’s grammatical errors.
Nicole: I’m gonna talk as loud as I want wherever I want. They SHOULD listen. I have important things to say. Then I’m gonna make all my friends watch Food Inc & go vegan & start wearing HATS.
Rei: I’m gonna get married and buy a house and then I’m gonna get a divorce and sell a house.
Nicole: Miss you, birthday buddy
Rei: I’m gonna have the same best friend forever.
Rei: Then I’m gonna blog our conversation about turning thirty.